Once upon a time....no seriously longer than that, you might not have been born yet...I qualified for 20 something pro tours, the vast majority of which I didn't bother to go to.
I eventually escaped the dungeon I was in (some may call it Akron, Ohio) to live in a far away magical kingdom (literally Disney World). Once there I went on many crazy adventures such as going to medical school and playing way too much poker.
Now my happily ever after consists of yelling at kids to get off my lawn. I also occasionally draft on Arena where I am an infinite mythic drafter. Something something random buzz words cuz I R creative.
Monday through Friday from Noon to 3PM EST.